Tuesday, July 18, 2006


Aussie expats Matt Smith and Derek Green, AKA The Hairy Banana, just managed to escape the bombings of Beirut only days before it began. “We would have punished that mini bar if we had have been stuck there,” they both claim. “But seriously, this is terrible”.
In fact, the two said they were supposed to be there but luckily for them the client asked to shoot a week earlier.
“It really hit home that we do work in volatile areas,” says Smith. Their roles at Saatchi & Saatchi are Regional Creative Directors of Central Eastern Europe, Middle East and Africa, based in Geneva. In fact they work for both Israel and Lebanon.
Says Smith: “it’s so sad, only the Friday before we were briefing the Lebanese team on a job and they were all so happy saying that they were glad the civil war was behind them”.
They have heard from both of their local agencies. All are ok but are not expecting the best for the next few weeks.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a load of toss! "just managed to escape the bombings only days before they began"

Hey, it might just be me, but doesn't that mean they were well out of the way when things kicked off. It's not like it was only half an hour before the boming started.

It's like I only just escaped the second world war by being born in 1972. This rates as one of the worst cases of bandwaggoning I've seen. The Sun newspaper in the UK would be proud of this sort of shite.

Lynchy, please don't insult our intelligence with this sort tat.

11:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fuck 11:12am, how do we escape from reading your shit?

2:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm surprised Matt wasn't snatched from his hotel in the dead of night by Mossad. He looks like a dodgy Hezbollah operative – but with a superbly convincing Ocker accent, obviously.

3:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Abu Hamza Rabia is the man you are thinking of. Al Qaida third in command killed in pakistan about year ago. google his name and you discover and uncanny likeness to Mr Smith

7:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know what you're all thinking; the bombs dropped on the wrong target. If they were accurate, perhaps then the Hairy Banana might have split. Forever. Ha ha ha haaaar

10:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Indeed. If Matt gets on a tube train in London with a backpack he may end up with 7 bullets in his head.
I agree with 11.12 anyway.

8:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

God so do I. It reminded me of Thorpie banging on to the media about going back for his digi camera and missing the twin towers collapse.

If I was born at a slightly different time at a different hospital with slightly different parents I could have been Droga.

9:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd take them slightly more seriously if they hadn't named themselves after their own (presumably very hairy) cocks.

9:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice spin boys. Nice spin. Keep that profile up, and we in Oz will never forget you.

1:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

9:30, you obviously missed the first reel. It went like this:

As a fairly unknown freelance team, these guys did a self-promotion mailer featuring a shot of themselves in the nude with their cocks tucked between their legs so they would look like chicks - or as much as this couple of blokes doing that old party trick can look like women - with a caption offering themselves as a hot new female team.

You've got to give them some credit for originality, chutzpah or just plain politically incorrect zaniness at the very least.

And it's so nice to see them still very much in love.

5:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear 2:07pm

You've obviously, and very recently suffered severe brain trauma. Why? Beacuse of the facile nature of your comment. If you wish to engage in, partake of, any meaqningful discussion, it really does help if, rather than just use expletives to sound tough or cool, you have a point. Sadly, I don't believe that you're actually bright enough to respond with anything other than you've already done; your comment is nothing more than an automatic reponse. It has no substance whatsoever.

Stick to tossing off in the toilets; I've heard you're good at that.

9:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am sorry but anyone pretentious enough to call themselves The Hairy Banana, need to fuck off with the cyclone!

11:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Stop being an industry sychophant!

5:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's "sycophant", you illiterate twit!

10:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear 10:08

Get a life knob head.



11:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Who's that giving the finger over the Bananas' shoulders?

2:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perhaps 5:31 is a psychophant. Go Luke, keep the bastards honest.

2:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I hope your work is more interesting and engaging than your bogging.

12:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My bogging, though not particularly engaging, is as regular as clockwork, thank you 12:36.

Every morning as soon as I get out of bed.

But shouldn't you be hard at work drawing up your writer's ideas?

2:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The guy giving the finger is Luke Crether from The Glue Society. He has such a handsome finger. He keeps it pristine by polishing it until it's super shiny, then he shows it off for all to see. He only uses it on special occassions and this is one of them.

11:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I sincerely hope that it's not "as soon as you get out of bed", otherwise your bedroom would continually smell of shit.

best wishes


9:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very astute, 12:36.

No, most days I actually make it all the way to the toilet.

Reminds me of the joke about the three elderly guys moaning about what a drag it is getting old.

The 70 year old starts by saying " I get up every morning and stand in front of the toilet for 10 minutes, but...barely a trickle."

"Hahh!" butts in the 80 year-old. " I get up every morning and sit straining on the can for an hour...and nothing."

"What are you two complaining about? You've got it easy!" interjects the 90 year-old.

"Every morning at precisely 6.00am I piss like a racehorse and shit like a pig."

"Huh" say the other two in unison..."So what's the problem you silly old coot?"

The 90 year old shakes his head and shudders. "I don't get out of bed until 7."

Love, 2:56

3:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


You are redeemed! That made me laugh so much I shat my daks.

3:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're welcome.

10:47 AM  

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